Shield of Sneaky Heraldry: This enchanted shield can magically change its heraldry whenever the wearer wants to, bringing confusion to the enemy on the battlefield (and possibly to friendly forces as well). Although we didn't start with the D&D stable alliterative 'in an Inn', a serious metaphysical discussion in the pub gave rise to an observation; that quality control at the magic item sweatshops is superb - there never seem to be any duds of anything on the market. Everything works exactly as it should, and everything is really useful - even the cursed items. Drumkit of Dolphin Summoning: Does exactly what it says on the tin. Quite what the party are supposed to do with the 4D20 dolphins that have just entered the material plane is anyone's guess Tasha's Hideous Bowler: An enchanted hat so utterly unfashionable that it causes anyone within a 20ft radius to point and snigger, but only when the wearer isn't looking.

of 100 mostly useless magic items - Giant in the List of 100 mostly useless magic items - Giant in the

Bottomless Mug, a masterwork stone mug, all craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. Despite being normal sized this can hold 10 gallons or 40 liters of liquid. It's another one of these threads! I'm looking for suggestions on humorous, cursed, useless, or mostly useless magic items. They can be for any edition, but the best entries should be generic enough to apply to most editions. Cup of Last Comfort: This badly-dented tin cup from an ancient legionary chaplain's field kit holds about 8 ounces of liquid. Any drink administered to a dying creature from this cup tastes pleasant, dulls all pain, and makes the imbiber vividly remember their happiest moments until the imbiber either dies or is healed by other means. It has no other effect, and does not affect creatures for whom death is not imminent.I think there are some days when you let the melody take control over you and the other days when you let the lyrics sink in. I felt both today. Cloak of Dramatic Billowing: makes anyone look heroic (optional +1 charm), but a downright liability when you're trying to sneak up on people

Florence Welch announces debut book release - NME Florence Welch announces debut book release - NME

Champions Chessboard, a fine elven made chess board made with white quartz, basalt, and red cedar. User must win a chess game with this board to attune to it (Int DC 20) Chess pieces will slaughter each other and mend after every game. On attunement chesspieces will obey one command from you out of game for thirty minutes (treat entire team as a tiny construct.) Earmuffs of silence: Wearing these enchanted earmuffs makes the user completely unable to hear anything. This makes him immune to spells like Command and effects like those that Bards deliver. They come in different colors, too. Since forming Florence + The Machine in 2007, Welch has been a force of nature: big voice, striking costumes, dramatic rococo imagery. Interviews have dealt frankly with her giving up alcohol and partying in favour of nights in front of the TV. Mirror of Mirroring: Upon looking in this mirror, you instead are mirrored, swapping all of your handedness and symmetry as if you were the mirror image instead. This effect can be reversed by you casting "Mirror Image" on the mirror. Ring of Fire, a rose gold ring, when the command word is spoken the ring activates it’s once per day heat metal spell. Wielder is not shielded from the effects of this. Range of activation 100ft.Quill of Rage: An ordinary quill that will only write when you scribble in the corner to make sure it is working. (Comment: “You horrid, wretched, vile thing. Why? Why would you create this? Why?”) Occasional Table: Sometimes it's a table, sometimes it's not. It tends to choose not to be a table just as you're about to place something fragile on it.

Useless Magic: Lyrics and Poetry -Unlimed - Yumpu Read PDF Useless Magic: Lyrics and Poetry -Unlimed - Yumpu

A treasure . . . beautiful. Generous in its honesty, by the end you feel as though you have climbed into the colourful, and sometimes tortured, world of a passionate artist' i If you are new to Florence, go listen to her records and fall in love with her! But for longstanding fans, this is such a special glimpse into the creative mind of the artist. It includes nearly all her lyrics, a handful of poems, and a ton of sketches and jottings ripped from journals and stray pads of paper. Her lyrics really hold up to being read without the music to accompany them, and the poems definitely felt like a glimpse into her writing process. Cubefinder (Consumable): A 10ft pole with one end capped by a caked-on powdery substance. When you are holding it in front of you and feel it hit something unseen, look at the cap. If you see and hear the cap fizzing like crazy while the pole starts to dissolve, you've found a Gelatinous Cube. Wand of tomato slinging. This wand made from a bramblewood tree limb fires spectral tomatoes as an action dealing 1 physic damage for each hit. 100ft range. Horn of Annoying Proclamations: This brass bugle compels its bearer to raise it to their lips and announce their companions' passage through any sort of doorway or portal with a loud and poorly performed fanfare, forcing all allies within earshot to make a dc 10 wisdom save or be compelled to cover their ears or slap the horn blower.Dagger of Whittling. A finely made halfling dagger, once attuned to, this dagger can whittle one small object once per day without the use of it’s master. Luggage, can range from a tiny construct to fully grown, made out of a sentient tree this majestic creation can carry up to four hundred pounds, six cubic feet or one medium sized terrified creature. Luggage is vulnerable to fire. Luggage can attempt to bite or slam an enemy at 1d8 of piercing or slashing damage. Luggage can grow from a tiny construct to full ottoman sized. To keep it useless recommended to use stats of tiny construct. Wand of SneezingYou point at someone and they sneeze, could hypothetically be used to trip someone up in combat, but it has failed to be successful so far.This one could be useful for interrupting someone in the middle of casting a spell.

Florence Welch - Useless Magic Lyrics and Tracklist | Genius

Taliasman of Ultimate Neutrality - Does nothing, ever, but is silently judging you for being an extremist Anyway, I stumbled upon David Bowie (around the beginning of high school maybe...?) with Life On Mars? and oh my giddy aunt I loved that song so incredibly much. Hey, who am I kidding, that song has been my top song every year since then - I still love it to death. To put it in perspective, I have a playlist called Life On Mars? Playlist and it contains one song (give you one guess as to which song) and I put it on "shuffle" and listen to it for hours, days on end. No joke. All of a sudden I didn't care what the new songs were. I didn't even try to keep up with anything. My love for Life On Mars? inevitably expanded to all of Bowie's stuff (fun fact: when I first found Bowie I didn't have much internet access, like I mentioned before, so I always pronounced his name BOW-ie, as in take a bow, and it wasn't until many years later when I realised it was BOW-ie, like tie a bow) and now I have all the Bowie things. Like, if someone asks what I like, I rattle off a few books (obviously); Doctor Who, Star Trek and Star Wars I lump into one; and then I say David Bowie. Pyromaniac’s Peppers, Small purplish red peppers, 3/3 charges. Allows the user to do a 1d6 fire breath weapon, tastes like burning. Rod of Castellation: An intelligent item that will loudly comment on the quality of construction of any structure you happen to be near.Arsonist's Tinderbox: An otherwise innocuous tinderbox that sets fire to everything - flammable or not - in a 20' radius. Sword of Little Man Syndrome: Weapon (longsword), Uncommon (requires attunement by a dwarf, halfing or gnome.) Once attuned, the sword magically adjusts in length to become 2x your height, becoming a weapon one size larger than you. In addition, the sword gives you the following properties: Camel of Water Storage: A magical, living camel, that can drink several hundred gallons of water and store them indefinitely, for the owner to retrieve when needed. The method of retrieval is, however, not for the faint-hearted. Wand of Mole: When you use the Wand of Mole a mole is summoned in an adjacent square and it rolls initiative. On its turn it burrows into the ground and avoids combat. Menace of Marbles, A marbles game bag that they don’t make like they used to. Provides 1000 marbles that can be summoned (treat as ball bearings) Dex 10 to avoid them. 1000 marbles creates four 5x5 ft squares. Marbles turn to dust in 24 hours and bag recharges daily.